Yeah, yeah, yeah1. It’s not a shoe. It’s a midsole material, but people were pissing their pants to get anything in the BOOST line. adidas did well in the initial marketing, if not a little overboard. It was kinda like a rock/fashion show, except shoes. Claims of durability are legit. The thing about the weather resiliency is negligible, but whatever. It’s at once soft and responsive. The Energy BOOST are good. The adistar BOOST are meh. The Adios Boost are better than the Adios 2, but still don’t compare to the original. I would totally roofie myself for another pair of the original Adios. I don’t know what that means.
HOKA ONE ONE
HOKA get a nod because people would piss other people’s pants for these. Whatever your opinion of them, it is impossible to deny that HOKA have influenced just about everyone’s design. Everyone makes a knock off of the HOKA now, and why not? Several times I’ve stated that I think that people should run in whatever is the least amount of shoe they’re comfortable in, be it a VFF or a KISS boot. These are the KISS boots I was talking about. I’ve tried them, and see why people like them, but I just can’t get into it. Some people swear by them, which is all I need to know, but they still make me think of, like, a Yaris monster truck.
Yeah, so what if they were introduced in 2009? Shit came back from the dead.2 They’re that good. Except that the new Miami Dolpins colors will cost you an extra $10. I know! Seriously. I’ve got some Magnum P.I. label Op shorts in the complementary color, so I’m cool with it.
Every night before I go to bed I’m all, “Are you there, God? It’s me, Margaret. Please don’t fuck up the new Launch v2, due out in Spring, 2015. Please don’t. Maybe make it a bit lighter. Maybe lower it a couple millimeters in the heel. But don’t fuck it up. Please don’t fuck it up. Don’t fucking fuck it up, alright God?”
New Balance 1400v
I like the midsole of the v2 better than the v1, but the upper of the v1 better. No matter. New Balance might have caught on that you don’t mess with brilliance. Just like Saucony would do well to put the Kinvara at the center of their design focus and create everything based on that platform, New Balance should do the same with the 1400. The 1400 fit so snug, and ride so smooth that you almost feel like it’s too good to be true. It’s not. Almost. But not quite.
Since now we have absolute confirmation that you’re supposed to have a fuck ton of shoes so you’ll never get injured or get scabies and shit, you can’t do the whole “If I could only have one shoe…” thing. But if I could only have one shoe…
Newton Energy NR
I’ve always liked Newton. Except for the time before that, when I thought that they were, you know, stupid. Back then, if I saw someone wearing them and I asked how they liked the shoes, responses were often not unlike this: “Fucking love them. LOVE! Them! I’m totally in Zone 2 this week. Recovery mode. Doing a carb/cal flush. Ironman. Doing the kale suppositories now. 15K threshold swim next week with a mini-fridge tied to my testicles for resistance. Old school. Brick.” I don’t even know what the fuck all that is, but you can see why I turned my nose up at them.
The Energy are the gateway drug for Newton.3 The transition is butter and there is still that pop that you get from the lugs. They’re a gentler, kinder Newton. I love that Newton is thinking forefoot for technologies. Next year’s lineup—all with 5 lugs—should be the shit. Brick.
ASICS Cumulus 15 Light Show4, 5
A few of my all-time favorite shoes—Gel Lyte II, GT-2020, Tiger Paw—were from ASICS. The fit and feel of those bad girls turned me on and made me want to run, whatever the pants situation. These make me want to post pics of the kimchi smoothie that I’m drinking out of my new Patagonia Puffy Cup that I can’t believe I have I’m taking a selfie right now Lululemon!
1Great rock band. Karen O is so hot.
2Take the sockliner out.
4Or, Nimbus, whichever.
5What the fuck is wrong with people?
Next time: More shoes of the year AND what to look for in 2014.